This Parenthood Thing
I’m a mom, so I’m obviously a bit biased, but I just want to give a HUGE shout out to all the fellow hard working, sleep deprived, multitasking moms out there. You are ALL rock stars. Whether you’re a working mama or a stay at home mama, you are doing a truly fabulous job at this whole mom thing. Even if you don’t think you are, I promise you that you are. I know that I personally, sometimes feel better after an exhausting day if my husband or my mom tell me “You’re doing a good job, you’re a great mom”. I won’t lie and say that I don’t NEED this validation, because it feels good to be told that you’re doing a good job when you’re responsible for raising tiny humans, right? I saw that movie “Bad Moms”, and though my children are much younger than the moms’ children in that movie, it’s true that there is a TON of pressure now a days to be “the perfect mom”.
Sometimes I wish I was raising my children in the 1950’s, it seems like life was so much simpler back then. No one had access to the internet, so no one could compare who was doing what. Ya know? None of the “Are you doing baby led weaning? Is your baby exclusively breastfed? Are they crawling yet? Walking yet? Talking yet?” Exhausting. And you know what? I promise all of our kids will grow up doing all of these things, it will just be at different times. With my first child, I was so adamant on doing everything “right”. I refused to let her watch any tv, I read her books every single day, exclusively breastfed her for the first six months, and we did tummy time daily. With my second, I’ve loosened up the reins, you could say. And I love my son just as much as I love my daughter, but I cannot strive for perfection when I have a toddler running around and I have a baby who makes it his mission to roll anywhere and everywhere. And you know what? He is the happiest baby I personally have ever seen. Don’t get me wrong, he has his moments where he’s cranky from being tired or teething, but I have found that if he watches a few minutes of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse with his sister while I prepare lunch, this has not wrecked him.
Because the bottom line is this: parenthood is SO time consuming. There are days that I am shoveling a sandwich in my mouth so fast that I’m not even enjoying it, I’m solely eating because it’s lunch time and I know I’ll be starving later, while rocking my baby on my hip AND encouraging my toddler to use the restroom before her nap. I literally never blow dry my hair anymore, I do my makeup every other day, and I can’t remember the last time I shaved my legs. I sometimes forget to eat breakfast. Or brush my hair, because it is almost constantly in a pony tail. Some days I don’t shower at all and just rely heavily on deodorant and dry shampoo. Some nights I’m so tired that I am in bed by 8pm and I am loving every second of it. I have mastered the technique of eating at a restaurant with a baby on my lap while somehow still getting food into my mouth. Yes, sometimes there may be a stray noodle or piece of bread that drops onto my baby’s head, but I just tell him that it’s builds character.
And I want to give a shout out to the hard working dads as well. I sometimes marvel at how my husband has limitless energy when it comes to making my toddler “an airplane”, or running around with her, lifting her up and onto his shoulders, or just general Daddy behavior. How he always makes time to talk to both of our kids when he gets home from work, will play pretend or read them books, and is always quick to point out something interesting he thinks that they’d enjoy. He also puts up with my crazy antics. He has never asked why I’m still in yoga pants and it’s 5pm, or why there is food on my face and the kitchen is an absolute destroyed mess but I’ve only been able to produce a frozen pizza for dinner and call it a day. He takes my tears in stride and never questions why I’m crying over reheating my coffee for the 5th time, but instead will give me a giant hug and encourage me to take some time for myself.
You are all doing fabulous jobs! You are. Whether you are a working parent or a stay at home parent, you are doing a good job because you care. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t worry, or feel guilty, or wonder if you were being a good mom or dad. It doesn’t matter if you can’t remember if you brushed your teeth today, or if your child is dressed more fashionably then you are and you have mismatched shoes on but were too tired to find the right pair (I can’t tell you how many times I spend all of four seconds looking and then I’m like “Oh this is just the new mom fashion!” and carry on). So smile, and give yourself a gigantic pat on the back. You’re totally rocking this parenthood thing.