The Happy Little Things
I have always kept a journal, even when I was really little and would start each entry with “Dear Diary” and proceed to write about whatever boy I had a crush on, or some big secret I just had to jot down. Anyway, I was flipping through an old journal the other day, and landed on an entry one month after my husband and I had gotten married. This was before we had children and had just returned from our 2 week honeymoon trip in Spain. And the first three sentences read: “We slept in until 9am today and just had a lazy morning. Cut up some fresh pineapple and tried out our new espresso machine; reminds us of our time in Spain. We made blueberry muffins and ate breakfast out back on the new picnic table we just built.”
Let me just pause real fast for a quick nostalgic sigh. Oh man, what bliss! Sleeping in until 9? I can honestly say the last time we did this was easily over 2.5 years ago. And I know this as a fact because it must have been before our daughter was born, as the latest we sleep in now is 7am. Tops. I think I’ve seen 7:30am maaaaaybe twice in these last 2+ years. The food & coffee part sound lovely, but in all honesty we can still do that now. It might not be as relaxing, and we might need to re-heat our coffee 6 times before drinking it, but it’s still doable. It’s just so funny how your life can take such a drastic turn once you have children. And I’m not complaining. I cannot imagine life without my children; and this time is so very fleeting, it’s just interesting to remember “before” and “now”.
Pre-kids, my Friday night would consist of splitting a bottle of wine with my husband, going out to dinner somewhere, or looking up a recipe to try making some fun new dish (you know the kind I’m talking about, where you spend as much money on the ingredients for one single dish as you would for your entire week’s worth of groceries) and staying up late watching a movie. Or completing an entire Netflix series because we could. Let’s have a peep into present time, shall we? 5pm the baby wakes up from his last nap of the day. Dinner is attempted to be made, all while balancing my baby on my hip and encouraging my toddler to color or play with her toys or not to fill up on snacks. 6pm some sort of dinner is served. We try watching whatever Netflix show we’re currently watching while also making sure our toddler eats and our baby is still happy in his bouncer. 7pm rolls around and the kids know it and decide to just let loose. Cue toys being thrown on the floor and swift apologies afterwards. Cue the baby crying and giggling in random spurts. My husband and I divide and conquer, each grabbing a kid and trying to clean up from dinner. Bath time, brush teeth, everyone in pajamas, coax everyone to bed and we are down for the count.
Today was just one of those days where everything seemed to go wrong, and I couldn’t help but remember that journal entry. I thought of it as my toddler skinned both her knees and burst into tears and I carried a crying squirming child in each arm to our van. I thought of it when I hurriedly shoved my toddler’s discarded smushed raspberries into my mouth because I forgot to make myself lunch (and breakfast). And I thought of it when my toddler woke up from her nap and brushed her hand down my cheek and said “I love you Mommy, can I peas hold my baby?” and proceeded to give her baby brother a sweet hug and a kiss on his cheek.
There will be good days and bad days. For everyone, not just parents. Lately I’ve found myself writing about the tough days. I think that’s ok though, because life isn’t perfect. It’s crucial though, to remember the things that are good though; as it’s so easy to only remember the bad things that happened that day. So today I will remember how my baby wanted to eat ice cream with me and my toddler, and how my toddler thought it was hilarious and gently told him no. I’ll remember how my baby grabbed my hair on either side of my head and touched his forehead to mine and cooed happily. I’ll remember how my toddler told me that she wanted to make Daddy dinner, and proceeded to lay out a fine arrangement of plastic food at 3pm. And I’ll remember how my husband had laid out a blanket, fresh diaper and water bottle for nap time today, showing me he’s thinking of all of us. Hope you’re all having a wonderful day, and when you go to bed at night, try to go over all of the happy little things.