Moments Like These
I don’t know if I’m the only mom who does this, but sometimes there are moments when I am interacting with my children and I mentally take a snap shot. It’s not something I’m doing consciously, its more like my brain is recognizing something that I will just remember for the rest of my life. I’ll give you some examples of what I mean. When my daughter was around 7 months old, she would sometimes get really overwhelmingly excited and her eyes would get big and she would throw her chubby arms up into the air as if she could simply no longer contain all the joy she was keeping inside. And she would open her mouth and excitedly pant like a puppy. It was the absolute sweetest thing ever. And one day we were sitting on our back lawn together and I handed her a small flag to wave around and she lit up and started doing this. I quickly grabbed my camera to capture it, and then set it down so that I could take a mental snap shot. Because something inside of me knew that this sweet reaction would be changing soon.
Yesterday, my mom and I took my daughter and son to get ice cream. As we all sat around, I listened to my daughter happily tell me about how her chocolate ice cream tasted like chocolate and how she was a big girl and could use the spoon all by herself (despite the fact that a good portion of the ice cream had ended up on her face), and I happened to glance over at my mom giving my son tiny sample sized spoon fulls of ice cream. And my heart cracked just the teeniest, tiniest bit. My brain recovered first though, and took a mental snap shot of that moment. That sweet moment, where he would lean as far as the stroller straps would allow him to, and eagerly move his entire head towards the incoming spoon; mouth already open and waiting for that ice cream.
These types of moments got me thinking: my daughter doesn’t do her excited puppy reaction anymore. When exactly did that stop? And how long will we have this moment with my son before it too fades away? I watched both of my children, and with a bittersweet feeling, I realized that they will have changed all over again by this time next year. To be quite honest, it makes me sad. I know children have to grow up, but right now I just want to soak in all the feels of having a 1 year old and a 3 year old. It’s a bit strange to me, to think that the moments I am holding close were just regular ever day moments. They did not happen on some grand vacation where we were in some exotic location. They did not happen on a weekend when we were all home together. They happened during the most random of times. And it reminded me to really take the time to enjoy the little things.
Because at some point, my son will no longer be a baby anymore. I know that as soon as a baby turns 1, they are considered toddlers. And by all means, he most definitely is a toddler, in both his age and his actions. But there are certain moments when he glances up at me and all I see is my baby. My little, tiny baby who has the softest skin in the world. The chubbiest of cheeks that wobble as he toddles all over our house. His big hazel eyes (the only thing he got from me) that can convey such a wide range of emotions. And I’m yet again reminded of that quote: “Making the decision to have a child – It is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside of your body”.